Where does fun come from?

So how did this old saying go, 'after the rain the sun'? How about 'after the storm, a hurricane and a few catastrophes a beam of light'? I think I never thought twice what taking up studies next to modeling would really be like. I do think it's possible but it feels like riding a wild horse and trying to cook an egg at the same time. So classical singing (in case you missed what I studied) is going in the right direction it seems. Modeling is full of surprises, as it always has been. Both are so very challenging to me that I sometimes wonder why I didn't settle for gardening or contemplating life as a hermit. But then came the realisation: isn't life just made up of viewpoints? I can see things as being a great challenge, hard and struggle, struggle, struggle. Or I can take the best parts of it and ignore the rest.... Right? After all, this is MY life, no...? This realisation came to me a while ago and whilst I wasn't always remembering about it, I certainly did yesterday during a looong shoot and boy, am I glad I did. When you have a shoot-marathon with 60 odd evening dresses you know it won't be easy. It's easy though to make things even harder by complaining and just seeing the negative. So what I did was keeping good mood. Trying to figure out what I liked most about the photographer, the other models, the MUA etc. And I had FUN. Exactly what always feels like it has to come from somewhere else can also just come from YOU. It can be self-created. I no longer wanted to do a job that felt fun-deprived and awful. I chewed on this for a while. And then I saw I could be my own source of fun (I should tattoo this somewhere visible so I don't forget). So figuring out stuff in singing is tough sometimes? And it seems like I never have time for anything anyways and everybody else i so much better, bla bla blaaaahhh.... This is certainly one way of seeing it. The really fun thing is though that I can do something I love. Every day I discover something new. I have made so much progress in the last 2 years and it can only get better. The best gift we can make ourselves and people around us is creating our own fun.

On a blue day I confess...

After a long break the first words are always the hardest. Where were you, why haven't you given a sign of life..... It seems like there's a million reasons when really it's one thing: I just didn't feel like it. Lack of time is rarely a good excuse I find, because just like the old saying goes 'where there's a will there's a way'. The past 12 months have been challenging for two reasons: I took up music school and I was working a lot with 1 fitting client in particular. I gave up the latter and this allows me to reflect on past, present and future. I have been modelling full-time for about 4 years now. I'm looking forward to some of the coming gigs: a show in Moscow, one in Rome, meeting a new agency in Berlin and then, very exciting, 2 days on set for the film on Yves Saint Laurent. I especially love how the last one merges from 'being a model' into some acting. And obviously I _love_ YSL - who doesn't??

But these years have also been hard, at times, either because of way more work than I could handle or because of guilt trips on how I haven't been working enough this month etc. It isn't a job for the faint of heart and even balls of steel aren't a guarantee of walking out harm-free. I know I'm not the only one with a funny attitude towards food and I don't know many non-models who's physique has been critisised as much as mine or any of my friends from the business. Just that fitting client alone would tell me at least 1x a day my shoulders were too wide. That's 240 times in a year. Not to mention waist too thin, arms too long, height and whatnot. Nuff said. Staying positive is great. Best thing ever. Can't get enough of it. But what do you do with the accumulation of 'bleaaaargh'? I'm glad I'm able to do this profession and at this point I couldn't imagine doing anything else. I'm happy I have my music which has proven to be a good hide-away so far. In the meantime I'll be looking forward to many more unforeseen adventures and hope the weather will get better here in cold and rainy Paris!

2012

Have you already looked back at your successes of 2012? :)

Mine were (in chronological order):
 Going twice to beautiful Cape Town and spending my best ever holiday there
 Working for Sonia Rykiel and Yves Salomon
My first ever concert 3 appearances in French TV, each time playing a model
Meeting the designers at Voriagh
Roadshow with Wella all over France
Working for Martin Margiela, Ines de la Fressange, Blumarine and Ferragamo
Getting accepted in my conservatoire to study classical singing.
Translating a radio programme live and getting hats off from the director himself

 And meeting SO many wonderful, amazing, interesting people. I'm so very thankful for everything that I could experience in this beautiful and successful year. I hope you, reading it, can say the same.

 All I can wish myself and others today is persistence on our ways, to pick ourselves up when we fall and learn to recognise fortune's gifts. To chase away 'the blues', to always tranform negative energy into positive and win, win, win!

 Love Magda

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

2013 - a lucky number for many!;) What are your hopes and dreams for this year?