Friday, November 1, 2013
So how did this old saying go, 'after the rain the sun'? How about 'after the storm, a hurricane and a few catastrophes a beam of light'? I think I never thought twice what taking up studies next to modeling would really be like. I do think it's possible but it feels like riding a wild horse and trying to cook an egg at the same time. So classical singing (in case you missed what I studied) is going in the right direction it seems. Modeling is full of surprises, as it always has been. Both are so very challenging to me that I sometimes wonder why I didn't settle for gardening or contemplating life as a hermit. But then came the realisation: isn't life just made up of viewpoints? I can see things as being a great challenge, hard and struggle, struggle, struggle. Or I can take the best parts of it and ignore the rest.... Right? After all, this is MY life, no...? This realisation came to me a while ago and whilst I wasn't always remembering about it, I certainly did yesterday during a looong shoot and boy, am I glad I did. When you have a shoot-marathon with 60 odd evening dresses you know it won't be easy. It's easy though to make things even harder by complaining and just seeing the negative. So what I did was keeping good mood. Trying to figure out what I liked most about the photographer, the other models, the MUA etc. And I had FUN. Exactly what always feels like it has to come from somewhere else can also just come from YOU. It can be self-created. I no longer wanted to do a job that felt fun-deprived and awful. I chewed on this for a while. And then I saw I could be my own source of fun (I should tattoo this somewhere visible so I don't forget). So figuring out stuff in singing is tough sometimes? And it seems like I never have time for anything anyways and everybody else i so much better, bla bla blaaaahhh.... This is certainly one way of seeing it. The really fun thing is though that I can do something I love. Every day I discover something new. I have made so much progress in the last 2 years and it can only get better. The best gift we can make ourselves and people around us is creating our own fun.